One of the emotions experienced in Hills Like WHite elephants written by Ernest Hemingway is sadness. The women is making a the very hard decision to get or not get an abortion. In this narrative I bring my emotion of sadness from a rough experience in my life. When I met her, I never knew. I never knew I’d love her. I never knew she’d change my world. I certainly didn’t know she’d shatter my heart into a million pieces.
She really was something else. She had this aura of happiness that could light up an entire room. Her laugh filled me with warmth and brought joy into my sadness. Her voice was more calming than weed, just hearing her talk could calm me down in an instant. She was everything I didn’t know I needed. With her, I knew what love was. I knew what it meant to be happy with another person. I learned how to let go of myself and have fun around her. I could fill a book with every adventure we had together. From movie night with Domino’s pizza to Ocean City, there was never a dull moment when she was around. I spent more money than I had on her, but she found a way to make me happy for just $5. She was so excited about her present for me, it had me wondering what she could be so excited about. It was small, but it meant everything to me. What she gave me was a jar fill with blue and pink post-it notes (blue because it was my favorite color, pink because she used all of the blue) with “99 reasons to love you” written on it. Every post-it had a reason why she loved me scribbled out in her half-cursive, sloppy writing. Ya hella cute. I’m safe with you. You always put time aside to make sure I’m okay. 99 post-it notes of all the ways she cared about me. Every single one. That little jar meant so much to me. It was small, but it was everything. No matter if she was asleep, at school, or doing something else, I still had her with me. I was always reminded that I was loved by her, and why. Even when she was mad at me or when we fought, I always knew she loved me. That jar got me through countless sleepless nights when I was plagued with anxiety and despair. But all it took was one lie. One simple, stupid lie that ruined it all. Everything came crumbling down around me as she drifted further and further away from me. I was losing her and nothing that I did seemed to bring her closer to my heart. I no longer trusted the girl who had made my last two years amazing. “Who is he?” I said. “He is just a friend from my biology class.” she said. “Why does your friend from biology text you all of the time?” I said obviously slightly upset. “He just wants to hang out.” she said. I might as well have thrown that jar right out the window. It didn’t matter to her anymore. What once gave me joy was only a stab in the heart with every piece of paper. I kept it anyway, at least for a while. Mostly, because I was in denial that the girl of my dreams was gone. One lie, that made everything crumble.
3 Comments
Ashley
2/11/2019 10:22:45 pm
I see a lot of emotions in your blog. This lost mad me feel sad.
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Ashley
2/11/2019 10:25:12 pm
My apologize. The last sentence was supposed to say this post made me feel sad.
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Katey
2/12/2019 06:09:54 am
Your post made me feel really emotional.
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